2 weeks on...

2 weeks on and the memories of the crossing that stay with me are the good and happy ones. The evenings in the tent, the rest day on Friday May 13th, waving the French flag on what we called the summit of the ice cap although we still seemed to be going up for another 10 days after it (...), interviewing Petter on the "sofa" (i.e. our sleeping bags on the sled...), Norwegian national day, the biltong and mashed potatoes, our outings in Tassilak, and many many more... 


I try to apply the lessons that I learnt on the ice to my everyday life, especially the ones about "thinking positive" and that "I have a choice". This trek has definitely made me closer to my friends and given me a lot of self-confidence. Where I endlessly hesitated before, now I am much more straightforward and trust my instinct more. I also learnt that what is perfect for me, can be far from perfect for someone else, therefore I should not let myself be affected so much by other people's opinions, as, at the end of the day, I am the one living my life. 


I feel really bad as every friend I meet is so full of praise and admiration, and thinks that what I have done is an unbelievable achievement. I don't see it that way. Of course it was very difficult, but the proof that it was feasible is that I did it. It is true that I am no professional athlete, might be older than most people who do this trek every year and had quasi no experience of nordic skiing. But I am also (hopefully) wiser, and much more honest and tougher with myself than when I was younger. I also have the time and the means to go to the gym and train. And, from a mother's perspective, to be able to do this trek while raising money to help other children to get education and team spirit was a great motivation and fulfilment. 


Hopefully I will find the time to write a book, and Petter will be able to do a movie about this expedition. My daughters want me to do the same for all my previous treks and challenges and have a sweet idea about doing it. I have my journals and love rereading them. What started as an yearly 10-day escape from my life as a housewife in London has turned into wonderful memories of walking in the desert, going up the great wall of China, dogsledding, crossing Greenland, mountaineering, rock-climbing, trekking in Corsica and I am sure that I am forgetting some. I am very fortunate to have been able to do this while at the same time helping disadvantaged children. 

But for me, the real stars are my wonderful friends and family. Because at the end of the day, they are the ones who give me support and sponsor me year after year, trusting me to find the right charities and allowing me to enjoy the challenges without guilt, making me and a lot of children very happy at the same time. 

So a big thanks and three cheers to all of you!!

Back in my London life

First let me really apologise to all of you who follow me on this blog for not giving any news for the last week, but going back to London was quite hectic and more difficult than I thought!!


I came back to London from Reykjavik as planned last Thursday evening, May 26th. We landed at 8pm and on my way back from the airport, I had the impression that I had landed in a tropical country!! London was SO green and the trees had so many leaves. After not having seen a tree (or at least not one with many leaves) for a month, it was a very strange feeling. The traffic looked diabolical and I was glad not to be driving (which for anyone who knows me is unthinkable...). I could not wait to see Nicholas and Christophe, but then again, their enthusiasm and exuberance was difficult to cope with in the evening as I had lived in such a calm and recluse world! I had so many things to tell them, but so did they!!


Back home, my renovation works on the house had started and the next day, the builders were there, and I had a meeting with the designers about fabrics, wall colours, etc... My mind was 1000s of kilometres away, but I forced myself to concentrate. After all, if I want to come back to a finished house in September, I can't afford to waste time. So I hope that all the decisions I took on the Friday morning are good ones... but then again, I had already pre-decided many things before leaving for Greenland, and I had loads of time while skiing to think about the project. The friend who is helping me is also really fantastic. She has lots of ideas and energy and is always within the budget!


As it was a long bank holiday weekend, I insisted to go to the country with the boys who were very reluctant at first. There have always a party to go to, some friends they have to see, etc.. But we left on Friday night with the dogs who I was so happy to have back again (they look in great shape and very happy. I am so lucky that Barry looks after them. If anyone needs a dog walker, he is the best and please ask me). Valerie came on Saturday and stayed until Sunday afternoon, and it was very nice. We talked a lot with Valerie about what I had gone through, my feelings and emotions, the lessons learnt, and the fact that I found it difficult that everybody wanted to talk to me and see me, and I needed some calm to regroup!! So as the weekend went along, I slowly re-entered my life and became a Mum and busy London housewife once again!! Since then I have seen many friends again, and I really enjoy it.


So what did I learn from this trip? Well I could write a whole book about it, but very briefly here are some points:


.  I should try to think positively as much as I can as it really does give energy. On the ice, if I let anything make me angry or think negatively, it did act like a brake. The sleds started to weigh a ton, and everything took more time. On the contrary, focusing about the positive and my goal, helped me to keep my spirit up and made things easier. (for example: one day, snow was building under one of my boots, making my ankle wobble, the snow was very warm and I had to constantly stop to scrape my half-skins, and to top it all, one of my sleds was tipping as it was badly loaded. I was fed up and almost exploded, but then, I thought: "what good will it do?". So I cleaned my boot, removed the skins, reloaded the sled, and life was good again. 


. Going back to happy and fond memories is a great way to give you a boost, make you happy, and make time go faster. Thinking about your loved ones and friends too. 


. I had always be quite cynical about life and people, but I realised that most people were very keen to help and support me. I just had to ask for help. So I have decided to be less shy and proud and ask for help next time I need it. I am not talking about asking for sponsorship money, but more like everyday life. I actually discovered the true value of friendship during this trip and I was and (am still) overwhelmed by how many people read this blog, send me messages while I was on the ice (although unfortunately I could not read them), and have since got in touch to congratulate. Thank you so much to all of you, you will never know how much you helped me.


. But the first lesson, must be the incredible power of the mind. I physically really reached rock-bottom on day 4, and thought that it was the end as I could not even contemplate to eat or drink without feeling sick. I was shivering non-stop, cold, and without energy. But then, seeing my guides concerned and trying to make me eat, made me realise that it was our expedition, and that what we started together, we had to finish together. And somehow, from somewhere deep deep down, I focused on this goal and found the physical strength to bounce back. So now I know that it is true that "when there is a will, there is a way!".

Arriving in Isortok in style behind a dog sled

Petter and Per-Thore

Most people urge me to write a book about this experience, and I might do this, but it will take me a while to do so. It is still very raw and I have to think about it more. I have so many memories, so many emotions to sort out. I am incredibly glad that I did this trip as it was very beneficiary for myself as well as the charities I chose. Should I have done this before? Maybe, but as one cannot rewrite history, it was probably the best time in my life to do it. But one thing is sure. I truly believe that this would be a hugely beneficiary gap year trip. As it dead flat, white and there is absolutely nothing to look at for 20 days, and that we always think about something, it is like a mental retreat. Very interesting! Although, I must admit that many days were spent fantasising about... food!! The dried-freeze rations tasted all the same in the end, and the last days, our ultimate treat was biltong with mashed potatoes!! So we talked endlessly about food, exchanged recipes, favourite restaurant names, etc...